Family Matters columnist, Georgina Fuller, bemoans the so-called ‘Disney adults’ that have taken over children’s spaces
I CAN’T say I was surprised to hear that the so-called ‘Disney adults’ are one of the most loathed groups in society, according to a recent article in Rolling Stone magazine. The piece pointed to a Reddit post written by a bride who opted to pay for Mickey and Minnie to appear at her wedding rather than feed her guests and included a listicle, published in Bustle in 2014, of nine things never to say to a ‘Disney adult’ including “Adults who like Disney are weird.”
As the parent of three young kids, I’ve lost count of the amount of times I’ve been shoved out the way or tutted at by ‘kidults’ (adults who act like kids) at theme parks, cinemas and in restaurants with salad bars which include crunchy, processed bacon bits - in other words, places which no self-respecting adult should be seen in.
At our middle child’s 10th birthday at Legoland last year, the only ride he really wanted to go on was the Pirate ship but we kept being jostled out of the way by a group of three twenty-something ‘lads’ trying to queue jump. I’m no killjoy but they should have known better, shouldn’t they? I told them to wait their turn and this was met with the sort of eye roll I usually get from my 14-year-old when I tell him to finish his peas.
Then there was the time when I took two out of three children to a grubby, hazardous waterpark on an industrial estate in the outskirts of a picturesque French town. It was a like the Fyre Festival of water parks and had very little to offer other than a few dodgy looking slides and a manky bar serving bière and frites but the kids were immune to the rust and loved it. I could hardly disguise my annoyance when a couple of 20 somethings kept dive bombing into the children’s pool, shoving my daughter, who was then around five, out the way.
Another time, I took all three to see Puss in Boots (one hour and forty minutes of my life I will never get back) at our local cinema. We booked the ruinously expensive but fun reclining seats at the back of the cinema but each time my nine-year-old whispered a question to me – “Is that a cat or a small dog, Mummy?” the kidults in the row in front of us turned round to shush us. I’m not a fan of anyone talking at the cinema but if you’re going to watch a film with a U or PG rating, you can’t really complain, can you? They didn’t even have any children with them. One had a bald patch on his dome shaped head which I felt like flicking my popcorn at.
What gives with these infantile adults who think they have the right to take over children’s spaces? Did these people not have a proper childhood and is this why they are now trying to relieve theirs? Live and live and all but it’s not really okay if they overlook an actual child in the process now, is it?
I found myself so perplexed and, indeed, vexed, I asked a couple of experts what they thought.
Dr Becky Spelman, psychologist and founder of the Private Therapy Clinic, says the phenomenon of ‘Disney adults’ can be seen as a response to the complexities and demands of adult life. “Engaging in childlike activities and immersing oneself in children's spaces can provide a temporary escape from the responsibilities and stressors of adulthood. It allows individuals to tap into a sense of innocence, wonder, and nostalgia associated with childhood.”
For some, this behaviour may stem from a desire to recapture the carefree and imaginative aspects of their youth, Dr Spelman says. “Engaging with Disney themes, characters, and entertainment can evoke a sense of joy and happiness that may be reminiscent of childhood experiences. It offers a break from adult routines and allows individuals to connect with their inner child.”
So should a grumpy midlife mum like me cut these 'kidults' some slack. Perhaps it's just a bit of harmless fun after all - or do I have a right to feel aggrieved?
Psychologist Dr Meg Arroll, says that compassion is key. “You do have a right to feel aggrieved but if you cut these kidult some slack, your grievances will diminish. I see quite a few adults that feel a profound sense of uselessness about the future and hitting those expected adult milestones – buying a house, having a family, trying to save and so on. Young adults have lots of obstacles to overcome these days,” she says.
Just try telling that to my nine year old next time she gets elbowed out of the way in the pick and mix queue by an over-zealous kidult trying to ‘live their best life.’
First published in The Telegraph.
